Woman, wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend... Just when I thought life could not get any better I heard a knock on my door, it was Cancer.
It changed everything but not for the worse. I choose Life and Hope .
BACK OFF CANCER is what I say!

The beginning of this journey...shaving my head

The beginning of this journey...shaving my head
Me, Francesca, on April 1st 2007, the day I shaved my head....

Sunday, July 15, 2007

She is well! Really!



Francesca will probably come back home today. PROBABLY, may be tomorrow, who knows ... but for all of you that checked in with me - I promise she is totally well!

"She is in the hospital" raises flags, "what is the matter?". Nothing is wrong - but the hospital is a safer environment for her to be in while undergoing these last few treatments, as the last spinal chemo didn't sit too well with her.


Two weeks ago, three days after a spinal chemo, hours after Carsten flew to Switzerland, a migraine kicked in, so powerful, the doctors suggested she goes to the hospital. I went with her. Rock bottom is a haunting image. The color on her face fading right in front of my eyes, her eyes would roll backwards, her hearing skipping, her head exploding. And than .... you known THAT scene in the exorcist - YEAP. Like that. Picture this ... a room in the cancer center, much like an Emergency Room. Bed after bed, curtains in between for privacy. All patients face this "island" where nurses keep their paperwork, magical fluids, syringes and plastic gloves. The guy next to us spoke louder than Francesca, he was getting ready for bone marrow transplant. A male nurse was with him, telling him how to clean his ... (never mind, I wont share the details of that conversation happening TWO feet from us). Francesca was delirious so much pain she was in, from time to time she would hold on to my arm, hanging on for dear life. She was getting worst by the minute. I kept thinking there has to be something they can give her. IV was in, morphine, anti many things pumping into her veins and nothing was helping her. THEN, two nurses went back into the island. Behind the counter was a cabinet, behind the cabinet a safe, like in banks, vault and everything. They put on gloves, signed a bunch of papers, clicked it open and took this tiny container of I cant imagine what. And whatever that was, was pumped into Francesca veins. She got high immediately! It scared her a bit. We screamed "Nurse, bucket" couple of times that day. But thank God for nurses and doctors and medicines ... magical! Things fluctuated from terrible to okay all day long. And in the middle of it all, one of the nurses inquiries - as if the situation called for small talk - "are you sisters?" :)


I guess somethings never change, huh?

We can't help but smile at it all!

And PS: Chica - minha bolsa ta aqui, nao se preocupe com isso; tambem nao esqueci da esperenca, das regras do jogo do contente, da promessa de tomar uma crystal, do otimismo e Bali - com certeza!

Aquele abraco,
Xanda





4 comments:

Chiarapurpurina said...

Xanda,
Obrigada mil vezes,obrigada infinitas vezes por estar ai.Do fundo do meu coração.

Nega,
Que bom que voçe esta em casa!
Muitas saudades!

Chiara

Caliope said...

Alexandra!!! Q BOM q vc tá aí c a Francesca! Pq vcs n vem p o Brasil antes de ir p Bali?? Força p vcs duas!!!

neila said...

Checca,

Vem para Fortaleza, vc a xanda e os moleques.

Bjs

Neila

Sabine said...

Francesca can be lucky to have such a good friend (and almost sister). Thank you Alexandra!
Give her a big kiss
Sabine from France